Expat Rockstar New Years Party, Jakarta - “I Think I Cracked A Rib”

December 31 2009 12:15 AM Jakarta, Indonesia…

I got into CGK (Jakarta Airport) still chewing the dehydrated mangos I picked up in a Manila Duty Free. I know the drill by now: fill out the form, bee-line it to visas and have some proof of onward travel (a pen, small bills and a little bit of bribe money will get you a visa on arrival quick fast). I really didn’t have anything pressing to get to.

We still had a full day before the ERS party jumped off and my hotel, the Shang (Shangri-La Hotel Jakarta) always did a very good job at making checking in fast and easy for me.

So why was I in such a hurry???

Well it had just so happen that I had some phone numbers in my cell phone of a few gorgeous ladies we met on a prior trip to Jakarta that were dying to welcome me back in person.

After exchanging some pleasantries with my good friend Mr. Grey, his driver scooped my bags and we headed out for the Shangri La. I hadn’t seen Mr. Grey for 3 or 4 months and we had a lot planned for the next few weeks.

After a short drive we arrived at the Shang. Apparently they have some remodeling going on so the lobby was closed out. Shame really. I love sitting in the lounge and having a cigar with drinks. After a quick check in and a free upgrade to a deluxe suite (this is why I love my Shangri La) we went upstairs and started sipping some of the Hennessey VSOP I picked up at the Manila airport.

Mr. Grey was saying that we wouldn’t be able to make any of the clubs being that it was so late, “No worries J I have friends in low places.”

After a quick phone call I was able to procure entertainment in the form of 2 sisters and a lovely white skinned friend. Yes, that’s right, I said sisters (I can scratch that off the list). Oohhh they were givers.

Introducing Mr. B…

The following afternoon we had to head back to the airport to pick up a mutual friend. Mr. B. He’s a newb and boy did we have plans for him. We spent a few hours waiting for him as it donned on me that neither one of us had giving him proper protocol for getting through visa on arrival in a timely manner.

Mr. B is no stranger to travel so we didn’t have any worries. When we finally did find him he was dragging 2 huge suitcases and dressed for a cold night in New Jersey. Mr. B has done some traveling, but obviously not in South East Asia.

Mr. B’s a rare fellow though. Somebody you can count on in the best and worst of times. You’d be amazed what he can get accomplished with a shovel, a pick axe and a bag of lime.

Before he got checked in we had a few drinks on the top floor of the Ritz Carlton. The view is awesome from up there. Mr. B’s room was also plush. Very spacious and enough bed for at least 4 people (that’s how I decide if a bed is big enough…..by how comfortable I’ll be with 3 other people sleeping in it). After almost 20 hours of flight Mr. B was ready to cop a few Z’s and myself, hey I just had a disgusting sexathon with two beautiful sisters….I needed a nap too.

The Stalker…

Not even half way into my nap I get a ring at the door. “Mr. Otomo, you have package”. Word??? From who??? As soon as he said the name I thought to myself “how the hell did she find me????”. It was a girl I had stopped dating about two months back sending me a gift. Still kinda freaks me out when I think about it. I sent it back and killed all phone calls or packages to the room (let this be a lesson to you men out there: sometimes it WILL come back to you).

New Years at the Hotel Mulia…

Around 8PM I show up to the Hotel Mulia in a fresh Versace suit. In the lobby there’s 3 Indonesians on stilts and costumes. The lobby is packed, but what its packed with is Indonesians. That’s the thing about the Mulia, it’s a local hotel so it’s frequented by the local rich. It being local does not take anything away from it. I mean it’s a 6 star hotel in Asia.

The 3 of us get some dinner and discuss the night. Mr. Grey had booked out 2 VIP booths in CJ’s and as much Dom Perignon as we could get our hands on (we actually bought out every bottle they had left). We had 16 guest with us that were partying on the ERS tab (the holidays brings out the best in us) only 2 of which were other men. One thing we hadn’t planned for was that Boyz II Men were going to be performing in the ball room of the Mulia (this fact actual proves to be more interesting by the end of the night) for 500 US a head.

When we got to CJ’s the placed was packed to capacity. The only empty spot there was the VIP booths we had reserved. Awaiting us were bottles of champagne, candles plastic saxophones and new years top hats. Right away we start into the drinking. We had them bring out the finest cognac they could and some Jonnie Walker Blue for Mr. B. The band was more than off the hook this night.

The singer for the night was hot and her band was doing it like it was the last new year of their life. All around were hot Indo chicks partying their asses off and rich business men too cool to take the floor. As the night progressed even the lames got drunk enough to get up off the sofas and go all tribal on the dance floor.

From our booth we drank bottle after bottle until we were ridiculously stomped. In my haze I was completely unaware that we were so close to midnight until 5 minutes prior. We counted it down and toasted 2009, but if any of you have ever partied with me or Mr. Grey you’d know that at midnight…………………….we’re just getting started.

I hadn’t been keeping watch on Mr. B, but when I did pay attention I realized that Mr. B had gotten really, really sweet on one of our guests. I mean I had to give it up to him, here it is after only about 3 hours of partying Mr. B had a gorgeous foreign woman just dying to take upstairs. Cheers, buddy!!

Boys to Men Must Die!!…

So the party continued and out of nowhere Mr. Grey comes up to me and says “Yo, Boyz II Men is here!!!”. “Word???”, so he takes me over to this other VIP booth and there’s this big black guy sitting there and I’m like “where are they??”. Mr. Grey points to the lone gentlemen and then leans over to him and screams “HEY, CAN WE TAKE A PICTURE WITH YOU???!!!” and ever so calmly the guy looks at him and says “why you wanna take a pic with me???”. “Jesus, Mr. Grey, that isn’t Boys II Men”……….embarrassing to say the least.

Around 3AM the real Boyz II Men showed!!! They had just finished their show at the ball room and had come down to the club to give a shout out to the people partying. Now being that Cherry Hill is my old stompin grounds (about 20 minutes from south Philly) I decided to meet these guys. After all when I was 13 I was a big fan. So after they said their peace on stage I burrowed through the crowd and yelled out “Jersey over here!!”.

They were very receptive and took pics and from what I could tell seemed like alright guys (that other big black guy was one of their security).

We must have taken 8 pics with Boys to Men…

Well, Mr. Grey wanted 9 piks. NOW!

When he couldn’t get pik number 9 that’s when the old mercenary insane came out of him. Before I know what the f**k is going on Mr. Grey and Mr. B are shoving security guards and staring them down like it was high noon and every bullet in the revolver was about to get spent.

The whole while I’m off to the side about 6 or so feet from all this madness and I can’t help but shake my head. Here we are the only Americans in the joint………………………and we’re gonna beat the sh*t outta each other. Sweet.

Thankfully no blows were thrown……………..but that doesn’t mean that no one got hurt. Some harsh words were exchanged (Mr. Grey: “F**k Boys to Men!, you guys int’ s**t”) and eventually I was able to get back to drinking.

At this point I was seeing in threes Mr. B was slobbing all over his new found friend. Mr. Grey? Well, Mr. Grey was sprawled out on a couch in an alcohol and pain induced coma. Apparently somebody spilled champagne at our booth. Mr. Grey slipped and caught his side on the coffee table…………………hard.

As soon as it started was as soon as it ended. The house lights were up and chairs were going on top of tables. If we had spent anymore time in there they’d have been sweeping us out with the garbage. Mr. B was heading upstairs to get to know his girl a bit better, Mr. Grey was still sleeping and I was trying to fix my camera (which had been thrown about 2 or 3 times. Normally I’d be pissed, but the girl who dropped it was especially hot).

We all parted company and I got into a Silver Bird taxi and drove off into the dawn. No ladies, I was way too tired for that. I just needed to sleep and detox a bit. Maybe 7 or 8 hours into a good sleep I get a text message from Mr. Grey.

“I think I cracked a rib”

After that………….we hit Bangkok.

To Be Continued…

Anthony Otomo is an IT contractor living a somewhat nomadic lifestyle (traveling wherever the money takes him). He is currently working in Iraq and plans to put down roots in Jakarta, Indonesia in the near future. He is happily divorced with a daughter.

View All Articles By: Anthony Otomo

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