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Nick Gatsby

Thailand’s taxi drivers slide on and off my shit list as often an ass visits a toilet seat. There are days when I despise cab drivers and there are days when a driver has me howling with laughter.

A couple of weeks ago, I met James Grey at Suvarnabhumi airport. The PAD demonstrations were over and he arrived the day the airport re-opened. It wasn’t absolutely necessary for me to pick him up, but it’s nice having someone waiting for you at the airport, especially in light of the political situation. I took a cab to the airport, went inside to the prearranged meeting place, drank a M-150, and waited.

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A few days ago, I had a business appointment at the JW Marriott on Sukhumvit Soi 2. As is my norm, I walked out to the main street, Ladprao Road, stuck my thumb out, and hailed a cab. It was 6:00 in the evening and the sun was setting. The air was cool and free of humidity and I was feeling good.

A taxi pulled up, I opened the front door of the cab, and then asked the driver if he would take me to Sukhumvit Road. “Too much traffic,” he quickly responded. Despite Bangkok’s taxi drivers constant complaining about their poor wages, they consistently turn customers away.

Traffic was indeed heavy–but in Bangkok, the traffic is always miserable! TOT–this is Thailand–you would think as cab drivers they would be used to it, but this is one of their common reasons for denying fares.

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Seems like only yesterday when I decided to sell my business and make the move to Thailand. After a couple of trips to the country, I was certain Thailand was my Utopia. Years later, older and slightly wiser, I’ve concluded there is no Utopia – at least not in the physical sense. Not to burst anyone’s bubble but heaven on earth is a figment of our imaginations, devoid of any complete reality. Heaven is far reaching and every so often extends its hand – only until reality slithers its way back into the picture.

When I moved to Thailand, I was 32 years-old, I’m now 46. Fourteen years changes a person and while I’m certainly happy with my decision, I’m not sure I would have made a move at my current age and in my current situation. In other words, I made the move when the time was right.

As I said, Thailand is no Utopia, nonetheless, I can’t think of a whole lot of other places I’d rather be. Once you are entrenched in a foreign country’s society, its morphs from an exotic destination to a place you call home; normalcy replaces the euphoria of a vacation.

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Before beginning my diatribe, let me state for the record I certainly understand the utilitarian properties of the Thai bar girl. Why, if it weren’t for my wife-who I shall not preface with any adjective such as lovely, sweet, adorable, or kind-hearted (as so many seem to like to do when speaking of their spouse or children)-my own proclivity for bar girl would probably get the better of me.

Yes, if it were not for the wife, and my general shortage of discretionary funds, a harem I would certainly have. A different girl for each day of the month would be my bare minimum and Viagra would rest in bowls strategically placed throughout the house like M and M’s at a Van Halen concert. Moreover, nudity would be mandatory, and my girls would live on location doubling as secretaries, cooks, maids, and personal assistants.

Thailand has a habit of making old men young, allowing them to relive their halcyon days of youth and no place else on earth can you see such a superfluity of sixty-year-old men walking hand in hand with teenyboppers young enough to be their granddaughters. Young men who come to the country sow their oats, popping from bar to bar, getting drunk, hooking up, and having the time of their lives.
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Thai women are renowned the world over for their beauty, grace, femininity, and sexuality. They have that certain something that makes them alluring to men and their diminutive stature makes them doll like, while at the same time, womanly.

If you are interested in meeting regular Thai women though, where and how do you go about it? When I say regular Thai women, I am referring to those who have a profession outside of the tourist entertainment industry. This means office worker, nurse, grocery clerk, doctor, lawyer, etc.

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Continued From: Goodbye Rat Race Part 1

Making A Go Of It…

A few doors down from my office there was a company that sold fresh fish to many of the restaurants in the local area.  I was friends with one of the guys who worked there and he had taken several trips to Thailand and Indonesia. We would take long lunches once or twice a week and discuss what life abroad would be like. He had spent several months in Indonesia and returned with more money than he left with so I was always keen to hear what he had to say. It was at this time when I first started to think it was truly possible to live in an exotic destination like Thailand or Indonesia.

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Have you ever wondered what it would be like to pack up, leave everything behind and start your life fresh in a foreign country. Would you like to say goodbye rat race, while at the same time living life on your own terms?

People chose to leave their homeland for a variety of reasons; economic, political, social and religious reasons are a few of the most common. There’s a great big world out there – a world most people only hear about on CNN or see on National Geographic – and it’s a shame not to check out as much of it as possible. Nowadays, with the advent of the internet and globalization, you can make a living from just about anywhere, while at the same time traveling and living how you choose.

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You decided to sell everything you own – or almost everything – and move to the Land of Smiles. Traveling light, you toss all your clothes into a duffle bag, cram your suitcase with books, DVD’s, photos, and other personal belongs. You carefully slide your laptop into your backpack and then add your camera and the rest of your gear.

One suitcase, one duffle bag, and a backpack - you have simplified your life in to three bags.-This is the trade-off for moving abroad – for the life you’ve chosen. What you cannot sell, you give away, what you cannot give away, you trash. It’s either this or pay to ship everything by container. As much as you would like to do this, it is not worth the money or the hassle. Anything that has any legitimate sentimental value you bring with you, and when your feet hit Thai soil after the long flight, you are ready to embark upon your new life.

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