Let me take you back a few years, namely to the year 1999. This was before I lived in Thailand, however, by this time I had already visited the countries’ sun-soaked shores over seven times. I returned each year like a nice chap and did my best to help third world poverty by employing some of the locals. Well, to be more precise, local females. After all, you have to do your bit! Feed the world and all!

I was familiar with the whole bar scene and I knew it all, or at least I thought I did. You see being a tourist and having numerous visits under your belt tends to make you a little gung-ho that way.

I used to hit the red light areas of Bangkok, all the well-known places: Soi Cowboy, Nana, and occasionally Patpong. My favorite haunts tended to be the Nana and Cowboy as they were a ten-minute walk from my hotel.

This is where I first met Chuun. Chuun was a 28-year-old woman from the Issan province. I met her at Soi Cowboy in one of it’s many bars, can’t remember off hand, funny the beer seems to have that affect on me. Well it was a long time ago, and many a brass has cum and gone since then.

Getting back to Chuun…she wasn’t a looker and I’m at odds as to why I ever picked her up. I think she looked okay in the darkness of that cowboy bar, coupled with the fact I had my beer goggles on!

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Once termed The Sleeping Dragon, China has awoken from a sweet slumber of the depreciated Yuan to find a world in financial despair. The giant unfurls his wings, full of factories ready to manufacture the world’s good for a dime a dozen, and flexes his massive military muscles off the coast of Somalia while the world looks on.

Though still labeled a third world country, China’s major cities, Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou, Hong Kong and others, have surpassed the US in their creative architecture, enticing jobs, and innovative apartments. Indeed, the cities in China offer amazing nightlife, unique culture, a plethora of drinking and dining extravaganzas and career opportunities. So, what does it cost to partake in this giant’s emergence?

The cost of living in China has, in recent months, declined somewhat thanks to the burst of the housing bubble. Naturally, as with US and UK housing, this leaves thousands of people holding property that has declined in value, but for which they continue to owe an inordinate amount of cash.

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Last week, I joined Panama in the traditional last celebration before Lent. It was my first time in Latin America but it was the third country where I’ve done Carnival. I lived part of my younger years in Slidell, Louisiana, just outside of New Orleans, and have been to Mardi Gras many times. Last year, I enjoyed the unique Rhineland Karnival in Cologne, Germany so I was eager to see how things are done in this part of the world.

The celebrations in Panama are not nearly as famous as those in cities such as New Orleans or Rio De Janeiro, but from everything I saw the citizens here take it just as seriously, maybe more so when you consider that basically the whole population participates.

The party here in the capitol city of Panama is huge, and the one in Las Tablas seems to be the most desirable because of the competitive nature of the festivities there, but I chose to drive out to the little rest stop town of Capira about an hour North of Panama city.

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Sorry about the editorial being late. I’ve been so busy lately I didn’t have a chance to sit down and write it. This month’s editorial is more about what going on with us than the magazine because that’s what this magazine is about – people living the life.

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Just like a little boy that begs for something sweet, an Expat Rockstar expects his massage to end with a happy ending. Unfortunately, when you find yourself at the wrong place, this does not always happen. If you are craving more than just a massage but you don’t get what you want, it doesn’t necessarily mean she won’t ask for a tip. To some though, no happy ending equals no tip.

This is where the cultural gap widens and gets lost in translation. Sometimes it’s painful (literally) to find out the hard way that some Asian masseuses refuse to perform the act you desire.

There are hundreds, if not thousands of massage parlors or spas in downtown Jakarta however, not all of them offer full service to expat patrons. There is a difference in the vocabulary: Keluarga (family) or happy ending.

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Several years ago, while flying back to Thailand from Indonesia, a voluptuous young Asian woman took the seat next to me. Now most of the time I keep my trap shut while flying, even going as far as listening to my IPod to block out any blabbermouths that happen to sit next to me, but of course, this was different. Her smell alone made me take notice; she was sexy as hell, one of those rare women who managed to get my testosterone pumping full speed by her mere presence.

I knew had to talk to her and go for the number close – so I did. Within minutes, I knew her vital information. She was a 23-year-old Thai living in Indonesia, Surabaya to be exact, and she had been living there off and on for about a year. She gave “Coyote Dancer” as her profession.

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Racial Generalizations and Twisted Logic

It is impossible to explain anything or even describe anything without resorting to some sort of generalizations. Say, you come up with a phrase like this: “Antarctica is cold.” This statement is a generalization. People can tell you not all of Antarctica is cold and at times is warm. Someone who lives there will say something in like “it is not too cold for me.”

It is not too cold for a penguin, either. They live OK there and do not complain. However, if you say that average temperatures in Antarctica are lower than average temperatures in 90% of the world, which makes it quite cold for most people, then you will hit the nail on the head. Few people could argue with your statement.

When talking about this or that country, if we overly generalize, we will get these responses:

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